Everyone that knew Amber will recall her boundless energy, gregarious personality, sense of wit and humor, and her grace and beauty. Her smile would light up a room and she reached out to everyone she met to offer friendship and support. She was a black belt in tae kwon do, an entrepreneur and small business owner, a licensed cosmetologist, and a poet and artist. She was a kind, generous, loving person.
Sadly, she was also a heroin addict and alcoholic. She was introduced to substances of abuse initially in high school. After multiple treatments and years of struggle, she was able to overcome heroine but not alcohol. Her struggles with substance abuse were characterized by periods of sobriety interspersed with relapse. The periods of actively abusing substances were also difficult for those that loved her as we watched her personality change dramatically during these times and her life spiral out of control. She fought relentlessly to gain and maintain sobriety but ultimately lost her battle on June 1, 2016.
Amber’s Gallery
Amber’s Poems
I’m left alone, and I feel so small.
I hide behind my wit and a sharp tongue…
I can’t admit defeat, though the battles never won.
This time around I was cut to my core…
I don’t know how much heart ache one person can endure.
‘Define yourself as a woman,’ someone once asked of me…
That’s a difficult task when I can barely see.
I can’t believe I’m back in this awful place…
I wish you could see my tear stained face.
My visions so clouded by anger and love…
I hit my knees in prayer for guidance from above.
Where did I get lost so led astray…
I was shown the right path and forgot the way.
I stand firm in defiance if suits me best…
Yet I lay awake at night and I get no rest.
I cover my head so no one can see…
The weaker, simpler, softer side of me.
I’m expected to stand strong and proud and wise…
‘Fake it until you make it,’ isn’t that how the saying goes?
So I’ll put one foot in front of the other and brush it off so no one knows.
But your eyes have seen this and experienced my pain…
Will I ever find sunshine, through the clouds and the rain.
Who will help me up when I fall hard?
Be easy with me because I’ve been scared.
I’ll define myself as a woman with “strength” and someone you can “trust.”
That last word is an absolute must.
Hold out your hand and walk with me…
If I can love myself, I’m finally free.”
Surrender the anguish and let your soul be freed.
The signs are all around you, you just have to see.
You’ve got angels pulling for you, God will set you free.
To surrender isn’t to lose, it’s to give up the fight.
It’s the key to live another day and sleep another night.
Life will beautiful, just give it a chance.
Your spirit can soar above the clouds, and across the stars you’ll dance.
To know a life of serenity and to know peace, what more can there possible be?
To leave my legacy as a woman of strength and love. That’s what will define me.”